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Musings

The LORD is mighty and rules over all!
The LORD is worthy, which leads me to fall
Upon my knees when I see HIS face.
He blows me away with the depths of HIS grace.

How do you describe the indescribable?
How do you escape the inescapable?
How do you explain the unexplainable?
How do you bless the Possessor of all?

What songs could I sing, what gifts could I bring
To express the love in my heart?
How unworthy I am even to speak HIS name,
Yet HE loved me even BEFORE the start.

What can be said that HE has not said?
What can be done that HE has not done?
What can be offered that HE has not given?
Where can I go to escape from HIS love?

Why did HE choose me?
Why does HE care?
What moved HIS heart
So much that HE would dare
To die for my sins
And break all my chains?
What can I bring
To glorify HIS name?

LORD, YOU’re awesome, beautiful, and completely delightful.
YOU’re eternal, faithful, good, and HOLY!!

YOU’re invincible, just, Kingly, and loving.
YOU are mighty, near, and omni-everything!

YOU are precious, quick to help, righteous, and sweet,
Transcendent, unbelievable, venerable, and worthy!

YOU’re excellent, yet humble, and zealous for me,
YOU’re my SAVIOR; victorious, and wonderful KING!

YOUR presence is undeniable,
YOUR depths are unsearchable.

YOUR arm is unshrinkable,
YOUR grasp is unshakable.

YOUR power is unparalleled,
YOUR passion, uncontainable.

YOUR love never ends,
And YOU’re always available.

No words can describe YOU,
Yet YOU still hear our cries.

YOU are near to YOUR children,
Yet, dwell far beyond the skies.

YOU spoke all things into existence,
Yet YOU still speak to my heart.

I have no words to say,
Save these: “My GOD, how great THOU art!!”

Untitled

Why do we allow ourselves to squander hours watching television when the LORD is such a grander sight? Why do we find it easy to spend hours browsing the Internet, but find it to be of the utmost difficulty to spend hours with our Creator? What drives us to update our Facebook status every minute of every day when we barely speak our minds to our FATHER? Did He not give us the eyes with which we watch that computer screen? Why do we settle for prophets who “tickle our ears” when those same ears were given to us to allow us to hear the very voice of GOD? Why do we settle for “crumbs from the Master’s table” when He desires to let us feast until we burst upon the Bread of Life? Why do we consider reading the Word a necessary evil when it truly is the highest of privileges? What is it that causes us to innately be able to distract ourselves with petty pleasures when the Richest of Fare longs to speak into our lives? The LORD sits enthroned above the sphere of the heavens, yet we act as though our own sphere of influence is the only thing which exists in this universe. WHY DO WE WASTE OUR LIVES ON THINGS THAT DO NOT MATTER IN THE GRAND SCHEME OF ETERNITY? Many claim to “live for Jesus,” but few actually allow Him to lead their lives and have total dominion. All too often in churches today, the message of the gospel and the very pursuit of God are lost in fancy light shows, state-of-the-art “Worship Centers,” shallow worship, and the pursuit of the “almighty dollar.” When we follow this pattern, we’re merely building castles of sand. The pride I see in the hearts of those around me, whether it be the redeemed or the ones who claim to be, absolutely breaks me. The pride I see in my own heart all to often overshadows my boasting in the LORD, and for this I am ashamed. Where is the fierce longing after YHWH that the fathers of our faith possessed? Where has the fire that filled the bellies of the great evangelists gone today? Where is the deep, sincere WORSHIP, and where are the broken worshipers who bring it? This nation, though founded upon the Rock, has given up its first love in the name of “tolerance,” a desire not to offend, and the task of stockpiling wealth. We need to fall on our faces and beg for mercy from the throne. We are ripe for judgment, not only for the hearty approval we give to godlessness, but even more than that, for the complacency that has settled within our pews. If you claim to be a child of GOD, start acting like it!! Stop making excuses, stop pursuing worldly gain and impure lusts, stop wasting your life, and turn to GOD!! Call on His Name, fall on your face, give Him control, and worship in spirit and truth. Then, get out there and preach the gospel to everything that moves!! That is our mandate. Seek God with every fiber of your being, then share His love with everyone around you. ONLY GOD is worthy to be praised, ONLY GOD is worthy of our worship, ONLY GOD is ALPHA AND OMEGA, ONLY GOD IS GOD!! Seek HIS face, seek HIS face, seek HIS face!! Cry out to HIM!! Fall on your faces and worship!! JESUS, JESUS, JESUS, I LOVE YOU!! CHRIST, CHRIST, CHRIST I NEED YOU!! ABBA, ABBA, ABBA FATHER, HAVE MERCY ON MY SOUL, FOR I AM UNCLEAN!! I AM UNWORTHY!! I AM A SINNER!! HAVE MERCY, HAVE MERCY, HAVE MERCY!! I AM UNWORTHY, YET YOU HAVE REDEEMED ME, YOU HAVE CHOSEN ME, YOU LOVE ME!! PRAISE YOU, PRAISE YOU, PRAISE YOU!!! JESUS, JESUS, JESUS!! Oh how I love that name!! JESUS, JESUS, JESUS!! Oh, my LORD, CONSUME ME, CONSUME ME, CONSUME ME!! May I decrease, so that YOU may increase. I am YOURS, I am YOURS, I am YOURS!! HOLY, HOLY, HOLY, ARE YOU, OH LORD GOD ALMIGHTY!! HOLY, HOLY, HOLY!! The whole earth is FILLED with YOUR GLORY!!! My heart cries HOLY, HOLY, HOLY, ARE YOU AND YOU ALONE!!! LORD, HAVE MERCY! LORD, HAVE MERCY! LORD, HAVE MERCY!! CONSUME ME, MY GOD!! KEEP ME FROM HALF-HEARTED WORSHIP!! KEEP MY FEET FROM WALKING IN THE PATHS OF THE WICKED!! KEEP MY HEART FROM BECOMING CONSUMED WITH THE THINGS OF THIS WORLD, OH LORD, MY GOD!!! CONSUME ME, CONSUME ME, CONSUME ME!! I AM YOURS!! ABBA, ABBA, ABBA FATHER, LEAD ME INTO YOUR THRONE ROOM!! JESUS, JESUS, JESUS, COVER ME WITH YOUR BLOOD!! HOLY SPIRIT, HOLY SPIRIT, HOLY SPIRIT, GUIDE ME INTO ALL TRUTH!! OH GOD, MY GOD, CONSUME ME, CONSUME ME, CONSUME ME!! I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU!!! YOU ARE MOST HIGH OVER ALL THE EARTH!! YOUR VOICE SHAKES THE HEAVENS!! YOUR FACE OUTSHINES THE SUN!! YOU ESTABLISHED THE EARTH, AND ONLY BY YOUR GRACE DOES IT STAND!! YOU ARE THE GIVER OF LIFE, AND YOU KNOW THE NUMBER OF OUR DAYS!! YOU WILL NEVER DIMINISH, YOU WILL NEVER BE FAR FROM YOUR PEOPLE, OH GOD!! YOU ALONE ARE HOLY!! YOU ALONE ARE WORTHY!! I SURRENDER TO YOU!! TAKE ME, BREAK ME, USE ME FOR YOUR GLORY!! CONSUME ME, CONSUME ME, CONSUME ME!! MESS ME UP FOR YOUR GLORY!! MESS ME UP FOR YOUR GLORY!!! JESUS, JESUS, JESUS!! ABBA FATHER, JEHOVAH JIREH, MY ROCK AND MY SALVATION, I SURRENDER TO YOUR WILL!! USE ME, LORD!! USE ME, LORD!! USE ME, LORD!!! I cannot praise YOU enough!!! I love YOU, I love YOU, I love YOU!!! Ever shall YOUR NAME be on my lips!! FATHER, HAVE MERCY!! DO NOT ALLOW ME TO WASTE ANY MORE OF MY LIFE!! DO NOT LET ME SETTLE FOR THE CRUMBS FROM YOUR TABLE!! MAY MY HUNGER FOR YOU NEVER BE SATISFIED, MAY MY THIRST FOR YOU NEVER BE QUENCHED!! CONSUME ME, MY LORD!! HOLY, HOLY, HOLY, ARE YOU, OH LORD GOD ALMIGHTY!!! ONLY YOU ARE HOLY, OH LORD GOD ALMIGHTY!!

A Sweet Aroma

But thanks be to God, who always leads us in triumph in Christ,

Always leads us in TRIUMPH!! In VICTORY!!! In POWER!!

Who will separate us from the love of God which is in Christ? Will tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?…But in all these things we overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loved us.

No matter what we come up against, we shall have the victory through Christ.

Even death is victory when Jesus is our Lord and Savior, for He conquered sin and death when He paid the ultimate price upon that cross and rose three days afterward. EVEN NOW He is ruling at the right hand of His Father. Never shall He be defeated, nor shall we as long as He is the One holding us.

But thanks be to God, who always leads us in triumph in Christ, and manifests through us the sweet aroma of the knowledge of Him in every place.

A sweet aroma…a head-turning fragrance.

The aroma of victory…the aroma of grace.

When we walk with Him every day, people notice the difference immediately just by being around us.

When we are cursed, we bless them.

When we are hurt, we still reach healing hands out to them.

When we are beaten, we still offer them a loving embrace.

As we are being killed, we ask the Father’s forgiveness on their behalf.

The degree to which we follow after God, seek His face, and hunger and thirst for His Word and His life is the degree to which the fragrance is made known to those around us.

For we are a fragrance of Christ to God among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing; to the one an aroma from death to death, to the other, an aroma from life to life. And who is adequate for these things?

Among those who are lost, among those whose hearts are hard toward the things of God, our sweet fragrance is a burning cancer, a weakling’s crutch, or a fool’s obsession.

It is practically a death warrant to those who are opposed to the God of all. Whether or not they voice it or are even aware, those who have not put their faith and trust in Christ as their one and only Lord and Savior are His enemies, just as we were before our own salvation.

Enemies of God they are, but more than that, the Lord is gracious to them. “But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” He reaches His hand out time and again to give them the chance to accept Him, but, while He is merciful indeed, He is also just.

“For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God…the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Sin separates us from our Creator, and the payment it earns is death. We are sentenced to be forever separated from God, but He “desires all men to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth.” To this end, He offers many chances to those dead in their sins to be brought to life forever. Many times, He uses us to be the instruments of His redemption.

While He chooses to use us, it is not our gift, nor our duty, to bring conviction. Rather, it is the Holy Spirit that brings conviction of sin, it is the victorious fragrance of God that pours out through our lives that sparks a desire for the knowledge of the Lord Most High, and it is the Lord alone that saves us and gives us eternal life. It all begins and ends with Him.

To those who are alive in Christ, however, this fragrance is a source of encouragement, an impetus to fuel the fires of devotion, a holy calling, a priceless gift, and a powerful ally. It is a constant reminder of the beauty of the Creator; a deeply touching, powerfully moving passion that one cannot help but feel humbled by. We can do nothing without Him and His divine guidance and mercy. Not even the life we live is our own, but every day is a gift from God above; we need not waste it on trivial pursuits. It is a glorious honor to be the bearer of such a lofty thing: the very fragrance of GOD!! We must never take it lightly. We must carry the torch with honor and dignity, power and mercy, love and sacrifice, and purity and gratitude until the day the Lord returns or the day calls us home.

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2 Cor. 2:14; Rom. 8:35, 37; 2 Cor. 2:15-16; Rom. 5:8; 3:23; 6:23; 1 Tim. 2:4

Here Is Your God

Brothers and sisters, “Here is your God!”

The matchless, faithful Redeemer.

The One Who calms the seas,
Yet shakes the heavens.

The One Who gently leads His flock like a Shepherd,
Yet, in holy anger, destroys the wicked and their schemes.

The One Who has measured the waters in the hollow of His hand,
Marked off the heavens by the span,
Calculated the dust of the earth by the measure,
And knows each hair on every head.

The One Who catches both the falling sparrow and the falling man.

The One Who has created the stars,
Leads forth their host by number,
And calls them all by name.

The One Who stoops to view the earth,
Yet grew up as a Man upon it.

The impossibly amazing, overabundantly providing, ever-near Father.

The incredibly merciful, overarchingly protective, ever-vigilant Defender.

The infinitely wise, overwhelmingly powerful, everywhere present God.

The righteous Judge,

The mighty King of Kings,

The wonderful Savior,

The Comforter, Guide, and Truth-Bearer,

The Alpha and Omega,

The Bright and Morning Star,

The almighty, unshakable, victorious One.

The Holy One of Israel,

The Anchor in our roughest seas,
Provider in our greatest need,
Hearer of our honest pleas,
And Bearer of our darkest deeds.

Our Hope of Glory,
And our glorious Hope.

The Resurrection and the Life,

The Bread of Life,

The Vine.

The Lamb,

The acceptable Sacrifice,

The One punished for our sins.

The risen and now reigning Lord.

The ultimate Peacemaker,

The final Adam,

The perfect Man, and perfect Deity,

One God, three Persons.

Father, Son, Spirit.

He strengthens the weary, revives the dead, heals the sick, exalts the humble, brings low the proud, destroys the wicked, and feeds the hungry.

He was not created by human hands, nor dwells in temples made by them.

Rather, He is the Creator and Sustainer of Life,

The Author and Finisher of Our Faith,

The One and only I AM,

Mighty to save, slow to anger, quick to forgive, good to all.

He endures with patience those vessels destined for destruction,
To manifest the depths of His neverending mercies to those being redeemed.

He brings tears to my eyes,
Only to immediately wipe them away.

In Him and in Him alone are love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control, for He IS all of these things.

Everything about Him blows my mind and leaves me speechless.

In Him, I am complete.

In Him, I am at peace.

In Him, I am ever-joyful.

In Him, I am ever-loved.

Brothers and sisters, “Here is your God!”

Encouragement

My sister, faint not.
Rescue is on the way.
Find rest within His shadow,
Sleep with your head upon His chest.
You are loved, more deeply than you know.

My brother, fear not.
Your anguish has been seen.
The prayers you poured out night after night
Are finding their fulfillment in His hands.
You are strong, even in your weakness.

My kindred, cry not.
You are held by the Father.
He feels your pain, He sees your tears
He covers you in His love, and brings comfort.
You are complete when you rest in His arms.

MY beloved, you are chosen.
Do not fear the task appointed you.
I will be with you always, offering strength.
I will give you the words to speak and the abilities you need.
Trust Me, and you will find peace within the gale.

Some Shaking…

GOD HAS MENDED THAT WHICH HE BROKE

“…Your grace has found me just as I am
Empty handed, but alive in Your hands…”

“…Praise, praise the Father,
Praise the Son,
And Praise the Spirit
Three in One…”

Maelstrom, pt. 2

I FEEL NOTHING!!

NOTHING AT ALL!!

No joy, no righteous remorse, no life in my bones.

Am I truly one of the chosen or am I just kidding myself?

Even when the Words of Life are read to me, they do not break me, they do not bring tears to my eyes, they do not bring comfort to my soul.

My heart is so…dark.

My mind is consumed with death and sinful thoughts.

My eyes find no sleep at night.

My strength is all but drained.

Am I truly devoted or just looking the part?

Then again, how can one be devoted if one spends no time with what he claims to be devoted to?

Reading, praying, seeking, praising…

Instead of acts of love, they seem like obligations to me.

I’m concerned about this mindset I’ve got…and even more so about the consequences that may lie ahead as a result.

People have always thought of me as the “good Christian.”

Lately, however, I find myself desiring to break that image, not so much through a coherent thought process and outright rebellion, but through what I’m allowing myself to think, do, watch, and say, and it scares me.

What do I do to counter this rising tide of disobedience?

How do I solve this dilemma of the mind, heart, and soul?

Why do I fill my life with wood, hay, and stubble?

When will I once again start building with gold, silver, and precious stones?

How much more abuse can my spirit-man take before he absolutely breaks down and dies from starvation?

Sure, I play guitar in front of the church and get together with friends to sing the same songs, but where did my passion go?

Where did that fire go that caused me to reach out with the gospel to a dying world fearlessly and constantly?

WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO ME?

Why do I find it so hard to devote my time to something I claim to love?

Am I just burned out from all the “church stuff” I do on a regular basis?

Have I become consumed by the darkness once again?

Was I ever truly out of the grip of the darkness?

Will my heart and mind ever find rest again?

I’m lost at sea…afloat with no paddle or engine surrounded by fog and darkness. My eyes are tricked into seeing land. I paddle toward it with all my heart and all the strength in my arms only to find disappointment at the revelation that there was no land there at all. I cannot find my way. I cannot bear this pain any longer. I NEED YOU NOW, MY FATHER! CAN YOU HEAR MY CRIES? Do You really look upon me with that same love that sent You to the cross for Your children?

I need answers. I need a rescue. I need more.

Maelstrom

WHAT’S THE MATTER WITH ME?

Why can’t I seem to devote myself to my Redeemer, my Savior, my KING?

Why do I pursue meaningless drivel in place of the Richest of Fare?

Why do I allow the fleeting things of this world to take precedence over those things which shall remain for all of eternity?

What kind of legacy have I been building?

Am I so concerned with mindless frivolity that I cannot bring myself to chase something that actually brings forth fruit after a measure of loving labor?

Am I so comfortable that I am content to lay aside my cross?

Or will the Light inside finally break through this darkness my eyes have become accustomed to?

Is there, in fact, any Light at all within me?

If there were, it would logically follow that I would desire the pure milk of the Word, but I find that aspect of my life severely lacking.

How can I hope to positively affect the world around me when I keep feeding the agents of darkness who reside in the dark corners of my mind?

How can I hear the Voice calling to me if I shut my ears?

How can I see the wonders of His hand if I shut my eyes?

I feel cold, calloused, incomplete, yet warm, soft, and whole.

How I long for a revival! How I long for a ladder out of this dirty mire of apathy and complacency!! How I long for PURITY in thought, speech, conduct, love, and faith instead of a devilish burning in passion for the darkness in my soul!!!

My words seem meaningless to me. My life is hidden in Your hand, but I feel not Your life within my bones. Oh what a wretched state! To be totally free, yet chained to this present darkness of my own will.

I need something more, something real. I need more than a sermon, a word of knowledge, a prophecy. I need a SOUL-SHAKING, LIFE-THREATINING, OVERWHELMING FIRE!! I need a HOLY FURY! I need an ATOMIC BOMB to go off and set my mind straight. Though I fear what that may mean.

I need new eyes, new hands, a new heart. OH MY GOD, I BEG YOU!! By the infinite mercies falling from Your holy throne, hear my cry!

Will it truly take a holy cataclysm to get me focused back on the Lamb and His righteous Word? Am I truly that far gone? Am I truly so conditioned? Do this, do that, ask for forgiveness, do this again, do that again, feel no remorse, ask forgiveness out of duty. Or out of love? Out of passion? Out of hope?

What will it take to light my soul’s fire again? Why have I grown so cold? Why have I let myself drift so far from the Source? Why do I continue chasing after the wind, even when I’m winded? The answers elude me. Yet I go about my merry business, putting on the mask of devotion when the situation calls for it. Is it truly of such little worth to me?

What is going on inside of me? How can I be content to sit around and waste my life? How can I be a good example if I live a life dependent on lies to keep me safe? Is my inner darkness truly so evil that I must hide it from the world?

Heh…the world already knows what it feels like, and the Lord already knows where my heart lies. What’s the use of keeping the closets closed, their skeletons hidden? Are others so judgmental that they could not see beyond my sins to the heart of me? Can I really trust others with my burdens? Or will my trust be betrayed? WHY CAN’T I SEEM TO BRING MYSELF TO FOLLOW WHAT I SPEAK TO THE MASSES?!? Why do the very Words of Life have such little value to me that I do not even spend two minutes a day with them?

Am I really so lazy? So complacent? So careless?

So cold…so hot.

So barren…so lively.

My life, my dreams, my hopes…my death, my nightmares, my fears.

I’m swirling down the drain with the bathwater…why do I not reach for help?

I’m running into so many walls…why do I not open my eyes?

Why can I not bring myself to feed the Light in my soul?

Is the darkness indeed so preferable?

Is what I’m pursuing truly worthwhile in the end?

Why can I not take up my cross?

My hands tremble…lose their grip.

I sink…deeper…deeper into the abyss…deeper into the darkness.

I’m lost…never lost…found by the Light…held in His hands.

Never alone…Light never lets go.

Thoughts overflow and collide…A maelstrom of emotion, yet no expression thereof.

Hopeless darkness…Never-ending joy

Evil…Good

Hell…Heaven

Mammon…God

Cannot serve two masters…which one do I hate?

I HAVE SO MUCH RELIGION, but so little relationship.

I ASK SO MUCH OF YOU, yet give You nothing in return for Your loyalty.

Why are You so good to us? To me? Even after spitting in Your face?

God IS love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.

God IS justice, anger, wrath, power, righteousness, holiness, light.

How do You balance them all? Justice vs. Mercy? Love vs. Hatred? Joy vs. Grieving? How can You stand to show faithfulness to the faithless? How can You stand to exalt the humble, even if after their exaltation they turn their backs on you? HOW CAN YOU BE SO GOOD? SO JUST? SO FAIR?

So fair…so wonderful

So fair…so pure

So fair…so mighty

So fair…so honest

Please forgive this wretched soul. Please, Abba FATHER, grant me peace in this hour. Please, my King, become my Lord and Ruler. PLEASE HELP ME!! PLEASE GIVE ME A FIRE THAT WILL NOT GO COLD!! PLEASE GIVE ME A DESIRE THAT WILL FIND FULFILLMENT IN NOTHING BUT YOU!! PLEASE GIVE ME A LOVE FOR YOU THAT IS UNFETTERED AND RAW, WILLING TO DO WHATEVER YOU ASK OF ME AND GO WHEREVER YOU WOULD HAVE ME GO!! PLEASE FORGIVE MY COMPLACENCY!! PLEASE FORGIVE MY UNFAITHFULNESS!! You’ve brought me back to the foot of Your throne. PLEASE CLEANSE ME!! PLEASE MAKE ME WHITE AS FRESH SNOW!! PLEASE MAKE ME AS PURE AS GOLD REFINED BY FIRE!! REFINE ME, oh God. REFINE ME, my Lord. REFINE ME, great and mighty KING OF KINGS!!

FATHER, MY HEART BURNS WITH REMORSE!! PLEASE FORGIVE MY CARELESSNESS, MY CHASING AFTER THE WIND!! MY HEART BURNS WITH A LONGING FOR YOU. PLEASE DON’T LET IT BE LOST AMONG MY DREAMS AS I SLEEP TONIGHT. Please don’t let me SETTLE for less than YOU!!! Please don’t let me find contentment in anything but Your Word and Your love. Please make those things that take precedence in my life over You turn my stomach so much that I cannot bear to spend more time with them than I do with You. Please help me despise all that You despise and love all that You love. Please guide me into ALL TRUTH!! Please guide me into the FULLNESS of YOU, oh precious Lord. Please forgive me for grieving You, precious Spirit! Please guide my steps so I may bring honor to You. Please forgive me for shaming Your cross, my Savior. Please guide me into life and life more abundant than any this world can offer. Please purge the darkness in my soul and replace it with Your marvelous light!! Become more important to me than shelter, than food, than water, than air, than LIFE!! Draw me to Your side, draw me to Your throne, from this moment on until I see You face-to-face in eternity.

Amen.

Sick

I’m sick of my complacency,

I’m sick of all the lies.

I’m sick of all my failures,

I’m sick of all the tries.

I’m sick of the façades I wear

When everyone’s around.

I’m sick of wanting nothing more

Than pleasure’s golden crown.

I’m sick of the rejection

That I fear awaits me now.

I need a place to run away

And shout out “HELP” so loud.

I’m sick of all the superficial

Friends that I’ve accrued.

I’m sick of all the pain I’ve caused

And that which is still due.

I’m sick of my half-hearted tries

To please the holy God

And my wholehearted disregard

To finish my tasks upon this sod.

I’m sick of my own efforts

To fight through life alone.

I’m sick of all the times

I never call you on the phone.

I’m sick of my crippling weakness

In temptation’s evil face.

I’m sick of all the muddy ground

I find here in this race.

I’m sick of the weary eyes

That long to fill with tears

I’m sick of the need to appear to be strong

In the eyes of all my peers.

I’m sick of all the apathy

That so pervades my life

And all the misplaced priorities

That fill my heart with strife.

So I bid a fond adieu

To all my dreams and hopes

And pray that soon the morning dew

Will cleanse my pain and let me cope.

I’m sick of my complacency,

I’m sick of all the lies.

I’m sick of all my failures,

I’m sick of all the tries.